When Sober Curious Strikes Past Dry January

Firstly of 2025, the previous US Surgeon Common issued an advisory on the hyperlink between alcohol consumption and cancer risk. Whereas it is a sobering name to motion, there isn’t any denying that sober curiosity has elevated lately. From Dry January to extra manufacturers creating alcohol-free drinks to the rise of mainstream mocktails, now greater than ever even informal drinkers have gotten sober curious and inspecting their relationship with alcohol.

Final 12 months in Episode 146 of the FBG Podcast, Sobriety Coach, and Founding father of Sober Wild, Krysty Krywko, Ed.D, joined our EIC Alison for an interview on sobriety. At this time we’re persevering with this dialog with Krysty. Dry January has handed however actually not the questions on what we are able to do if we’re fascinated by a sober (utterly alcohol free), or damp (a discount in alcohol consumption), life. 

Tam: Ought to we method consuming as all or nothing, particularly if we’re sober curious?

Krysty: I believe it’s a really private choice, however in the event you’re any form of an everyday drinker (which means three or 4 nights per week “simply to unwind”) then alcohol is impacting the best way you are feeling – mentally, emotionally, and bodily – your physique simply doesn’t know there’s one other method. In the event you’re not consuming throughout the week, however then consuming a few bottles of wine over the weekend, you by no means actually get the possibility to see how your physique and thoughts reacts to no alcohol. Anna Lembke, in her ebook, Dopamine Nation: Finding Balance in the Age of Indulgence, talks about how “abstaining from our drug of selection for a minimum of 4 weeks offers clarifying behaviors. Perception that merely just isn’t attainable whereas we proceed to make use of.” In different phrases, you don’t have any concept how shitty you actually really feel while you’re utilizing a substance that’s making you are feeling shitty. It often takes a number of weeks to your physique to regulate to the truth that you’re not consuming a poisonous substance.

Tam: Are there concerns/greatest practices to go from Dry January to extra of a Damp February and past? 

Krysty: So, I don’t actually know the reply to that query, it actually is dependent upon what your motivation was for Dry January. Was the plan to simply see in the event you may make it with out consuming for 30 days? Or had been you on the lookout for actual well being advantages? Or did you notice that your consuming has elevated over the previous few years and you understand you wanted to take a break?

Moderation, which is de facto what Damp February is all about, doesn’t work for lots of people. In the event you spend plenty of time bargaining with your self each time alcohol is concerned, which results in plenty of “guidelines” round your consuming, you would possibly wish to take a step again.

You won’t even pay attention to these guidelines. They’ve simply change into a part of your inside chatter. That chatter would possibly sound like this:
I’m not going to drink on my own.
No consuming earlier than 5:00 p.m.
No laborious alcohol throughout the week
I’m solely going to drink white wine (or beer, or vodka, and so forth.)
I can’t have greater than two drinks on per week night time.
I can’t drink greater than two nights in a row. 

The tip days of my consuming had been full of elaborate and arcane guidelines that had been consistently shifting as I broke one after one other. I used to be letting myself down every day, and that form of self-disappointment was like a relentless stream of micro-cuts to my soul.

Take a second and take into consideration why you’re placing so many guidelines round your consuming. You would possibly simply resolve that it’s not value it.

Tam: If somebody is studying this considering “I should not have an issue with my alcohol consumption however wish to take a extra aware method to what I eat/drink,” what questions needs to be explored when fascinated by alcohol consumption? 

Krysty: One of many first issues we have to do is transfer away from the language round consuming and the idea that there are “downside drinkers” after which everybody else. This results in disgrace, stigma, and judgement.

A way more helpful, and real looking, mannequin to make use of in the case of speaking about alcohol is the concept of consuming occurring on a spectrum. That’s the place the concept of “grey space drinker” emerged from, which encompasses everybody from the every-now-and-then drinker to those that are bodily hooked on alcohol. The great thing about this mannequin is that you just don’t have to hit any type of a all-time low earlier than you may discover your relationship with alcohol, you get to resolve at any level on the spectrum what’s best for you.

In the event you’re able to get sincere with the function alcohol performs in your life, I might recommend sitting down with a pen and paper and answering the next questions. Get interested by your self, and take the time to reply truthfully. Don’t cloud your responses with disgrace, or judgement, or what your bestie goes to suppose. That is about you and the one life that you’ve got, and whether or not or not you desire a poisonous substance to play a task within the creation of that life. 

Is alcohol nonetheless working for me?
How is alcohol making me really feel?
What areas of my life has alcohol taken over?
Does consuming align with the individual I’m now?
What would “future you” inform “current you” on this scenario?

Tam: What if our associates have gone again to consuming after Dry January, however we try to proceed. Do you will have options/suggestions for the right way to make this a part of my way of life with my consuming associates? 

Krysty: You would possibly want to seek out new associates – haha. However, significantly, if your mates actually respect and help you within the choices you make in your life, then it shouldn’t be an issue. However, in the event that they’re regularly making an attempt to push you to start out consuming once more, whining that you just’re not enjoyable anymore, or that one shot of tequila received’t do any hurt, you then would possibly have to rethink who you’re spending time with. You might want to determine for your self what you wish to do with the time that you’ve got, and the individuals you spend it with. 

Moreover, in case your pal group is closely immersed in consuming tradition – which means most social actions revolve round alcohol – you then would possibly want to seek out some new peeps that love to do various things.

Tam: Any favourite “drink” hacks to exchange that Friday night time cocktail? 

Krysty: I’m essentially the most fundamental sober individual round – and I’m proud of consuming a seltzer on my sofa to unwind after a busy week. However, I do know that individuals have totally different wants, and I get that within the early days of going alcohol-free you may want one thing a bit of extra thrilling. Fortunately, the alcohol-free market is on fireplace! There are such a lot of merchandise available on the market – suppose flavored seltzers, glowing teas, alcohol-free beers, wines, and spirits, kombuchas – I actually may go on and on. I’m regularly impressed on the locations the place I discover alcohol-free drinks – Goal, Dealer Joe’s, Complete Meals, common grocery shops, and native alcohol-free bottle retailers are beginning to provide such all kinds. My solely warning is be intentional when utilizing alcohol-free merchandise, particularly issues like alcohol-free wine or beer. In the event you’re downing a bottle of alcohol-free wine most nights of the week, it’s form of like ripping off one bandage and placing on one other, and also you would possibly wish to discover why you’re caught in the identical behaviors. 

Did you do Dry January this 12 months and preserve a dry or damp February? What’s your sober curious hack? ~ Tam